Damien's running around like a headless chicken, first floor's flooded up to my knees, oh what a beautiful day.

This better not end up with us sitting on the roof.

And, of course, birdgirl won't have a problem with any of this. Go make yourself useful and buy us groceries once this city turns into fucking Venice.

I'm beginning to wonder if I should get a job.

...



Nah.

Granted, it might help the whole being bloody bored as hell thing.

And here we go, another sappy holiday.

It's always hilarious to watch, whether it be here or back home.

( Private to Sellz // Unhackable )

And how long are we waiting for the poor souls to rescue us from these oh-so-dangerous monsters and come back home?

Shit, I'm bored.

...damned bitch better be coming back.

That ring certainly cost enough.

Maybe if I actually marry her sorry ass, she'll stay next time.

EDIT: Oh fuck me. This city can burn in hell for all I care. Fuck you, Purgatorium.

Can't we have another apocalypse or something? Come on. At least then, I could laugh at everyone running around like a headless chicken.

Still, it's better than London. Pity the upper level is a wreck, 'else I'd say we ought to move up there. Place is a shithole, not that I'm sure the upper level's generally much better. Still, you can't beat running water and electricity, now can you?

Damien, your dog creature thing nearly set my pant leg on fire. I'll give him a kick in the face next time he tries. Or just let him do it. You'll suffer in the end.

...So why is this brat following me around?

Christ, this place went to hell.

...Hah.

What in the holy name of god happened in this place when I was gone?

Ain't this a wonderful time to come back. God, my stomach. Is there a single thing to eat in this hellhole?

As much as the idea of having a job disinterests me, it's getting utterly boring around here. Watching Damien mix potions isn't my idea of a good time.

What kind of jobs are available, anyway? Preferably something a litle more hands on than deliveries or shopkeeping.

I need to do something in this shithole.

There's nothing quite like citywide brainfuckery dreams. But, well, I had always wanted a tattoo that looked like this anyway.

Sellz. Question.

Hm.

So how does one get ahold of these antidotes, anyway?

......

Goddamnit.

........

So what the hell have we missed over the last whatever here? New gods? And this place looks like more of a shithole than ever.

Hn.

Sellzy.

Where are you.

............

Fuck.

......Sellzy. I love you.

Damnit, I didn't have time to prepare for this! This wasn't even supposed to--

...I'll come back. Got it? I'll be back sooner than you think. Don't worry, darling. You can figure out just what kind of dress you want to wear, considering how goddamn indecisive you are. Tch, women. ...take care of yourself and don't kill too many things without me.

...should put the other on the line before it gets cut off.

[A pause, and then the voice changes, a little higher pitched and less rough---Damien's voice.]

...Max. ...even if your heart might lie elsewhere, I still love you. You saved me, and I thank you for that more than anything. I won't forget you...and I only ask that you do the same for me. Just that. ....Stay happy.

[The voice quiets, and it's impossible to tell who speaks next.]

We'll find a w---

[Silence.]

[Connection timed out.]

Always fun to watch the other crazies.

...interesting, though.

Well, that took care of itself.

( Private to Sellz // Unhackable )

Well, it's certainly been eventful lately, in ways. Crazy scientists, lunatics with amazing artistic abilities, tons of people coming and going---oh, forgot to say, very happy to see you again, future brother-in-law---and god knows what else.

I can't quite decide whether I like being left out of the action so as not to get stabbed in the face or experimented on, or disappointed that I get left out of all the fun. At least Damien seems to have an interesting little job lined up. A lot more exciting than ShinRa, that's for sure.

Seeeeeeeeellzy darling~ I do believe you wanted to talk to me about something sometime? Forgive me for not coming to you about it sooner. ♥ Oh, you ought to see how good I'm getting with my knives. Knock an apple right off a man's head, I can. .....though if I stab them in the face by accident, I can't say I won't be as impressed with myself.

Lockon. Whoever the hell you are.

Apparently I'm supposed to be thanking you for something in regards to my fiancée.

Whatever it was, it better have been a nice little talk. Otherwise~

tags: lockon should write a column, meisters make good advice givers, well she didn't punch me so

Waking up naked in the middle of the forest? Really, gods. That wasn't very nice at all.

Well, now that I'm all cleaned up and the pine needles are out of my arse, I'm in a better mood. That was an...interesting week.

Thank you for the document, Shu!

tags: back to normal, no more pedotime, pine needles suck